Today was the first day of our local homeschool convention. I was a little disappointed. Last year it was so good but this year it seemed a little disorganized. They didn't have a main speaker as they normally do. There were fewer vendor there this time and the organizers further decided to have the used book sale later in the summer rather than during the convention. There also seemed to be fewer people there this year for some reason. On the other hand this was just the first day and the weather was bad. There may well be more people there tomorrow when the weather is better and it is Saturday.
That said, the classes were very good. I really felt lead that I was basically on the right track, which is always a good feeling. It's much better than the feeling you get when you realize that you are headed in the wrong direction. Believe me I know, I've been there before.
I did almost get side tracked this year though. There is a curriculum called Trisms that is for Jr and Sr high students. It looks really good and I've heard some good things about it. It's very research oriented which is a good thing for Students planning to go to college. As I looked at it and listened as it was explained to me, I found myself wondering if I was making a mistake with my plan for my high school aged son.
I have a rule though; I buy nothing at the curriculum fair unless I know that I will be using it and believe that the likelihood of my finding it used at a fair price is small. Anything else, I pick up catalogs and information sheets and think it over and pray about it. That is what I did this time. Then later, as I sat in a class room before a class, I sat looking over the material she had given me. That was when I began to see the weaknesses. Not that this is a week program, I think it is rather good. The problem is that it isn't quite going where I think the Lord is leading us.
As it is a high school program, I didn't expect that it would have a high school level science program, though it did have some science. I also knew that we would have to supplement Math and some English; though they have made it compatible with probably the best Writing curriculum there is. It is sound in Geography and history. They probably have a better history program in some ways than what I have planned for the next four year as it includes history for places like Asia and Africa when I do not because I don't think I have the time to do it right.
On the other hand they are not meeting my goals for American History or Government or civics, or Great Literature. I believe history is important because it shows God's over arching hand; as the founding fathers would say, the hand for Providence. It's not just a matter of learning a bunch of facts. That is nothing more that worthless facts that puff us up and make us feel superior.
I don't think that is what God wants us to take from the lessons of history. I think what He wants us to see is the dance between Himself and us. The dance that helps us to see that the rules aren't there just to make us miserable, but rather for our benefit. As Michelle Miller, the author of Truthquest says
"God's initiation and our response . . . that's history. To the degree that we choose to believe and obey truth, to that degree our lives are blessed, our nations free and healthy, our science beneficial, our laws wise, our businesses prospering and our art glorious. Each of these spheres of life cannot be understood without grasping the spiritual issues at their base. Again I say, now that's history!"
History is important because it helps us see and understand God, but it is not the only thing. If my children are to be use to God they need to be well rounded. They need to have humility and knowledgeable. Humility, to keep them from become prideful and puffed up, knowledge, to be usable. They have to be able to write and speak well to communicate. They have to have knowledge of a number of different topics so that they can speak to a number of different people. As Paul said
"To the Jews I became like a Jew, to win the Jews. To those under the law I became like one under the law (though I myself am not under the law), so as to win those under the law. To those not having the law I became like one not having the law (though I am not free from God's law but am under Christ's law), so as to win those not having the law. To the weak I became weak, to win the weak. I have become all things to all men so that by all possible means I might save some. "
I want my boys to be able to be as ready as possible for whatever the Lord asks of them. To do that they need a well rounded education. They need me to give them, to the best of my ability, a renaissance education. I have know real knowledge of what the Lord plans are for my sons futures. I can only give them the basic tool so that the Lord can build on that. I think it is what the Lord is asking of me as their mother and teach. I am praying I get it right.
Friday, March 30, 2007
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
The Heart of Jeremiah
Prayer is a funny thing. For the past two weeks I've walked into Wednesday night prayer service thinking I was going to pray in one direction, only to find myself led to pray in a totally different direction once we started. Today I thought that I would be praying for our nation, our government, our church and the members that where sick. That was before church. Once I started to pray I felt led to pray for our community.
We are a poor, rural community that the world's problems have flooded into. We had a drug bust within our school recently. A number of the students caught had been members of my Sunday School class a short, few years ago. It broke my heart. Gangs have also come. I look at kids that have been taken away from their parents because they are drug addicts and I wonder how will they be good parents when they have never had an example to follow. I see the problem growing exponentially as generation after generation has no knowledge of what a real family is.
The worse part is that we as the Church share a large part of the blame. We have watered down the gospel. We have stayed withing our four walls and treated our churches as if they are social clubs, tut tutting at those we feel are not "good enough" to belong. We talk to each other about our salvation and how good our Lord is but hide that very solution from those with the most need.
What good are we to the Lord? The only plan he has ever had since Christ's death is to use us to reach others. When we refuse to do our part, we may as well be saying that we want those who don't know the Lord to suffer eternity in hell. How will we stand before the Lord on the day of judgment? When that friend or co-worker looks at us with eyes that say "Why didn't you tell me?"; how will we live with that? The consequences are frightening to me.
I thought I would be praying for growth for our church but instead I found myself crying out to the Lord for the lost. I found myself asking not for church growth but just for a chance to be a light house for Him. The Southern Baptist Church is big on numbers, but the fact is that the numbers don't mean a thing, except where they represent lives. So I found myself praying that we be an influence to help change lives, even if we never added another member to our list.
What good are members if they never come? Or, worse yet, if their lives are never changed? Just as standing in a garage doesn't make you a Ford, setting in a pew doesn't make you a Christian and having your name on a church role will not get you into heaven. Our mandate isn't to fill pews, and tisk at those who won't enter our doors. Our mandate is to introduce others to Christ, to help make disciples and change lives. Until we, like Jeremiah, have our hearts softened to the point that we weep for the lost rather than feel superior to them; I don't think we will be usable by God.
What a shame it would be to make it into heaven and realize that we never did the things the Lord intended us to do.
We are a poor, rural community that the world's problems have flooded into. We had a drug bust within our school recently. A number of the students caught had been members of my Sunday School class a short, few years ago. It broke my heart. Gangs have also come. I look at kids that have been taken away from their parents because they are drug addicts and I wonder how will they be good parents when they have never had an example to follow. I see the problem growing exponentially as generation after generation has no knowledge of what a real family is.
The worse part is that we as the Church share a large part of the blame. We have watered down the gospel. We have stayed withing our four walls and treated our churches as if they are social clubs, tut tutting at those we feel are not "good enough" to belong. We talk to each other about our salvation and how good our Lord is but hide that very solution from those with the most need.
What good are we to the Lord? The only plan he has ever had since Christ's death is to use us to reach others. When we refuse to do our part, we may as well be saying that we want those who don't know the Lord to suffer eternity in hell. How will we stand before the Lord on the day of judgment? When that friend or co-worker looks at us with eyes that say "Why didn't you tell me?"; how will we live with that? The consequences are frightening to me.
I thought I would be praying for growth for our church but instead I found myself crying out to the Lord for the lost. I found myself asking not for church growth but just for a chance to be a light house for Him. The Southern Baptist Church is big on numbers, but the fact is that the numbers don't mean a thing, except where they represent lives. So I found myself praying that we be an influence to help change lives, even if we never added another member to our list.
What good are members if they never come? Or, worse yet, if their lives are never changed? Just as standing in a garage doesn't make you a Ford, setting in a pew doesn't make you a Christian and having your name on a church role will not get you into heaven. Our mandate isn't to fill pews, and tisk at those who won't enter our doors. Our mandate is to introduce others to Christ, to help make disciples and change lives. Until we, like Jeremiah, have our hearts softened to the point that we weep for the lost rather than feel superior to them; I don't think we will be usable by God.
What a shame it would be to make it into heaven and realize that we never did the things the Lord intended us to do.
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
Proud Mama
The other day our son came home to say that his CAP commander had really gone to bat for him so that he could join the drill team for the regional competition. One of our friends, who is a senior member at the boys' CAP Squadron said that the commander had been really impressed with our son during the color guard competition.
It's kind of funny because it was one of those occasions where everything that could go wrong did. The eagle on the squadrons national flag had been broken and when they ordered a new one it ended up on back order. They were told it would be OK because Wing would have a set of flags there for any team that needed to use them. Well they did, but they didn't fit in the flag holders; Not ours, not there's. He felt awful his commander was very impressed with him through it all. Especially when our son handed the flag to one of the judges and asked her to hold it while he went and got our flag holders to use instead. I don't know exactly how he did it because our son said that the judge had said that she would hold it for him, so he let her. That's obviously not the whole picture or the commander wouldn't be so impressed.
He's always had a soft spot for our boys though. He thinks they can do little wrong. He doesn't coddle them though which is good. When our older son was the cadet commander he told me that the Col. really expected a lot more from him as a commander than he did when our son was just one of the officers. My reply was "To whom much is given . . ." My son said "I know, I know. Sometimes it's hard though."
Some times as a parent I see the places where the boys need work and am a little less quick to see the bright spots. It can be an awakening to see them through someone else's eyes. I'm kind of proud of them.
It's kind of funny because it was one of those occasions where everything that could go wrong did. The eagle on the squadrons national flag had been broken and when they ordered a new one it ended up on back order. They were told it would be OK because Wing would have a set of flags there for any team that needed to use them. Well they did, but they didn't fit in the flag holders; Not ours, not there's. He felt awful his commander was very impressed with him through it all. Especially when our son handed the flag to one of the judges and asked her to hold it while he went and got our flag holders to use instead. I don't know exactly how he did it because our son said that the judge had said that she would hold it for him, so he let her. That's obviously not the whole picture or the commander wouldn't be so impressed.
He's always had a soft spot for our boys though. He thinks they can do little wrong. He doesn't coddle them though which is good. When our older son was the cadet commander he told me that the Col. really expected a lot more from him as a commander than he did when our son was just one of the officers. My reply was "To whom much is given . . ." My son said "I know, I know. Sometimes it's hard though."
Some times as a parent I see the places where the boys need work and am a little less quick to see the bright spots. It can be an awakening to see them through someone else's eyes. I'm kind of proud of them.
Thursday, March 22, 2007
You Might Be a Homeschooling Mother If . . .
My husband is on the emergency management team of our little town. Now we have a number of emergencies to worry about. Our fire department is small and all volunteer, so in the winter we have to worry about house fires, since many people heat with wood, and in the summers we have to worry about grass fires because everything gets so dry. The number one thing we have to worry about though is tornadoes. We live in the middle of tornado country and March 12th of last year we had two hit our town. It was awful. Some places are still a mess.
Because he is on the EMS team and because our biggest worry is tornadoes he has to take a weather class every year. This year he talked me into going with him. It was really pretty interesting. As I sat in the class listening to the National Weather Service guy give the class I could help but wonder how I could use this information in class with my boys.
After the real part of the class was over he started talking about their web site and all the information available on it. I found myself wondering if it had anything on it for young people. I will check it out tomorrow. If not my husband has faith that I will be able, with the help of a few other sites I know, to put it on a level that my youngest could understand. He says "who knows maybe he'll want to be a meteorologist."
The funny thing is that when you homeschool everything you run across gets view with an eye toward whether it is something you could possibly use in class and how you could get it on their level. So as Jeff Foxworthy might possibly say "You might be a homeschooling mother if your kids are afraid of you going off to learn something new because it just might become a class for them as well."
Because he is on the EMS team and because our biggest worry is tornadoes he has to take a weather class every year. This year he talked me into going with him. It was really pretty interesting. As I sat in the class listening to the National Weather Service guy give the class I could help but wonder how I could use this information in class with my boys.
After the real part of the class was over he started talking about their web site and all the information available on it. I found myself wondering if it had anything on it for young people. I will check it out tomorrow. If not my husband has faith that I will be able, with the help of a few other sites I know, to put it on a level that my youngest could understand. He says "who knows maybe he'll want to be a meteorologist."
The funny thing is that when you homeschool everything you run across gets view with an eye toward whether it is something you could possibly use in class and how you could get it on their level. So as Jeff Foxworthy might possibly say "You might be a homeschooling mother if your kids are afraid of you going off to learn something new because it just might become a class for them as well."
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
Homeschool Plans Part 2
I didn't get this done as soon as I wanted. For some reason my computer isn't working right. It's slow and while I can read stuff I'm not always able to write. It's weird. I barley can make this thing work when all is well; when things are wrong I'm at a total lose.
Any way here's my plan for my youngest.
Bible - I will continue to use The Bible Story by Arthur Maxwell. It's an older series of books (first copyright 1955) that I picked up for the boys at a yard sale. What a blessing; I got the whole set for $20.00. I really like these for his age. We will use them one more year for school then he will be old enough to move on to Alpha Omega.
Math - I will continue to use Professor B Math. I like the results and see no reason to change.
Language Arts - Phonics/Reading/Spelling: I will use Writing Road to Reading and Teaching Reading at Home to tutor him in phonics. We will continue to use the McGuffey Reader for reading. As for spelling I found a wonderful site in the net called Spelling Time. You can program your own spelling list into the lessons.
On Monday they introduce the words. Tuesday the words are reinforced with Hangman. Wednesday they are reinforced with a Word Scramble. Thursday is a pop quiz. Friday is a Spelling Test. Throughout the week they are also writing the words. He is rewarded at the end of the class with a short game. Not only is he doing well, but suddenly spelling has become his favorite class. What more can you ask for?
Grammar: We will be using the Easy Grammar 2nd and 3rd grade text to teach sentience structure and punctuation. It's not really part of the Ambleside program, but I can do it in 5 minutes a day and I feel better having something to follow to teach this. Grammar is not my strong suit and I'm always afraid of missing something.
Poetry: We will continue to follow the Ambleside schedule. This year it's Walter De La Mare, Eugene Field, James Witcombe Riley, and Christina Rossetti.
Literature: Again we will be following the Ambleside Schedule. We'll use Lamb's Shakespeare to study Two Gentlemen from Verona, Romeo and Juliet, All's Well That End's Well, Cymbeline, Macbeth, and Comedy of Errors.
We will also read Understood Betsy, The Wind in the Willows, and Robin Hood. This may change over the summer. I may, due to the History period that we are studying, choose to use stories that take place in a medieval time frame.
Finally, over the next two years, We will cover Pilgrim's Progress. I think he will like it. His brothers were about his age when I read it to them and they thought it was great.
Social Studies - We will be covering World History, American History, Church History, Historical tales/Biography's and Geography. Each one will take up one day a week with the exception of World History which will periodically take two. This wont be bad as American history wont start until the last have of the last semester.
History: World History - We will continue to use An Island Story and will add Child's History of the World.
American History - We will use This Country of Ours.
Church History - We will continue to use Trials and Triumph. Both of the boys like this book. I've heard a number of parents who were upset with some of the stories because they felt they were too graphic and would upset their children. So far I haven't found this to be true, but we haven't reached the medieval times yet either so that may change. I just take it day by day.
Historical Tales/Biography's - This is a little fluid but as of now I am looking at The Little Duke, Joan of Arc, Abraham Lincoln, and one or more of the Little House books. If I change my Literature than these may change as well.
Along with the above I will also use a Time line with the boys to keep everything in perspective.
Geography - This is one I am really proud of. At the end of last year I found a book I really liked. It was Exploring God's World by Ann Voskamp. I decided to use it this year even though it wasn't a Ambleside recommendation. I felt that it was one the boys would like better. I was right. Now here's the cool part. This year it and her new book, Exploring the Holy Lands I think it is, are both new choices for next year. I try to choose well but to have the Advisory recommend to the group a book I liked so much felt kind of good.
Science - I have chosen to depart a little from the Ambleside recommendations. This year we used Miss Maggie's recommendations of Among the ______ People. My youngest really likes them. I will finish them up next year and also do the Chamber's Elementary Science Reader. This will give him a chance to read a class totally by himself. That will help with the transition to third grade.
Fine Arts - We will stick with the the Ambleside Composer and Artist schedule as well as the Hymn/Folksong schedule. I will also add art and hopefully piano. He really wants to play piano.
Foreign Language - We will continue with a light study of Spanish. We have a lot of years to get this done in and I want it to be fun. There is a show on University House that teaches Spanish to children his age and he likes it. I think we will continue with it.
That's it, my plan for the coming year. I know I will end up tweaking some things but it feels good to have it down on paper.
Any way here's my plan for my youngest.
Bible - I will continue to use The Bible Story by Arthur Maxwell. It's an older series of books (first copyright 1955) that I picked up for the boys at a yard sale. What a blessing; I got the whole set for $20.00. I really like these for his age. We will use them one more year for school then he will be old enough to move on to Alpha Omega.
Math - I will continue to use Professor B Math. I like the results and see no reason to change.
Language Arts - Phonics/Reading/Spelling: I will use Writing Road to Reading and Teaching Reading at Home to tutor him in phonics. We will continue to use the McGuffey Reader for reading. As for spelling I found a wonderful site in the net called Spelling Time. You can program your own spelling list into the lessons.
On Monday they introduce the words. Tuesday the words are reinforced with Hangman. Wednesday they are reinforced with a Word Scramble. Thursday is a pop quiz. Friday is a Spelling Test. Throughout the week they are also writing the words. He is rewarded at the end of the class with a short game. Not only is he doing well, but suddenly spelling has become his favorite class. What more can you ask for?
Grammar: We will be using the Easy Grammar 2nd and 3rd grade text to teach sentience structure and punctuation. It's not really part of the Ambleside program, but I can do it in 5 minutes a day and I feel better having something to follow to teach this. Grammar is not my strong suit and I'm always afraid of missing something.
Poetry: We will continue to follow the Ambleside schedule. This year it's Walter De La Mare, Eugene Field, James Witcombe Riley, and Christina Rossetti.
Literature: Again we will be following the Ambleside Schedule. We'll use Lamb's Shakespeare to study Two Gentlemen from Verona, Romeo and Juliet, All's Well That End's Well, Cymbeline, Macbeth, and Comedy of Errors.
We will also read Understood Betsy, The Wind in the Willows, and Robin Hood. This may change over the summer. I may, due to the History period that we are studying, choose to use stories that take place in a medieval time frame.
Finally, over the next two years, We will cover Pilgrim's Progress. I think he will like it. His brothers were about his age when I read it to them and they thought it was great.
Social Studies - We will be covering World History, American History, Church History, Historical tales/Biography's and Geography. Each one will take up one day a week with the exception of World History which will periodically take two. This wont be bad as American history wont start until the last have of the last semester.
History: World History - We will continue to use An Island Story and will add Child's History of the World.
American History - We will use This Country of Ours.
Church History - We will continue to use Trials and Triumph. Both of the boys like this book. I've heard a number of parents who were upset with some of the stories because they felt they were too graphic and would upset their children. So far I haven't found this to be true, but we haven't reached the medieval times yet either so that may change. I just take it day by day.
Historical Tales/Biography's - This is a little fluid but as of now I am looking at The Little Duke, Joan of Arc, Abraham Lincoln, and one or more of the Little House books. If I change my Literature than these may change as well.
Along with the above I will also use a Time line with the boys to keep everything in perspective.
Geography - This is one I am really proud of. At the end of last year I found a book I really liked. It was Exploring God's World by Ann Voskamp. I decided to use it this year even though it wasn't a Ambleside recommendation. I felt that it was one the boys would like better. I was right. Now here's the cool part. This year it and her new book, Exploring the Holy Lands I think it is, are both new choices for next year. I try to choose well but to have the Advisory recommend to the group a book I liked so much felt kind of good.
Science - I have chosen to depart a little from the Ambleside recommendations. This year we used Miss Maggie's recommendations of Among the ______ People. My youngest really likes them. I will finish them up next year and also do the Chamber's Elementary Science Reader. This will give him a chance to read a class totally by himself. That will help with the transition to third grade.
Fine Arts - We will stick with the the Ambleside Composer and Artist schedule as well as the Hymn/Folksong schedule. I will also add art and hopefully piano. He really wants to play piano.
Foreign Language - We will continue with a light study of Spanish. We have a lot of years to get this done in and I want it to be fun. There is a show on University House that teaches Spanish to children his age and he likes it. I think we will continue with it.
That's it, my plan for the coming year. I know I will end up tweaking some things but it feels good to have it down on paper.
Saturday, March 17, 2007
I Think I Have It . . . Almost
I think I have a plan for the next year. It will be rather long to put up both boys plans in one entry so I will start with my third son's, (I really ought to give him a nick name for here.)
So without further ado here it is.
1. Bible -- Alpha Omega 900 (It's not Ambleside Online. It's not even CM but the boys like it and I like the results so I'm sticking with it.)
2. Math -- Teaching Textbook Algebra I (I like this book. I have since the first time I saw it. Each year the reviews get better and this year Sonlight Curriculum is using it as their only suggestion for upper level math.)
3. English -- This is a little more complicated because it's a three prong approach.
Grammar -- "Easy Grammar Plus" (Short, sweet and to the point)
Literature -- I'll be following the Ambleside cycle for poetry and choosing Ambleside suggestions for Literature. I will try to pick some that go along with his history period as well. We will continue the Pluetarch and Shakespeare cycle as well.
Writing -- He needs to write more and so I will be assigning him more papers. I will increase the volume until as he gets older in an attempt to get him ready for the large volume of papers college will require. (I don't plan to use a curriculum for this. If I see any problems I may change my mind mid term or next year.)
5. History -- Yes I'm still pulling my hair out over this one. BUT I know that the Lord will come through. Here's what I have so far.
Either:
Diana Waring's History Alive OR Truthquest -- Anchient History (Creation -- 500 AD)
Truthquest is an Ambleside recomendation and History Alive is rather CM as well as unit study in philosophy.
I will support this with the following with living books and H. A. Guerber's "Story of the Ancient World" and "The Story of Mankind" by Hendrick Van Loon as my spines. I also plan to use Diana Waring's tapes no matter which ancient history book I use.
6. Fine Arts -- I plan to follow the Ambleside schedual for Music and Art.
7. P.E. -- This is rather silly but it is a required class for his transcript so here goes. My plan is simply this, I am going to turn this one over to my husband. Even though he is diabled now, he was a master trainer while he was in the Army. Not only that, he tends to be creative. Any thing I would come up with would meet the criteria but would bore my son to tears. My husband on the other hand comes up with some of the funnest (is that a real word) ways to move and get exercise. So it's his baby.
I told him this last night and he said OK. On the other hand he was sleeping at the time and he always agrees to anything I ask then. Probably not real fair of me I know; but he would agree when he was awake, there just would have been more discussion as he asked what was required and he came up with ideas.
8. Foreign Languages -- We will continue what we have been doing.
Spanish -- We will use Power Glide and Spanish for Dummies. (I would rather have Rosetta Stone but we have Power Glide and Rosetta Stone is so expensive.)
Latin -- We will continue with Latin Book I by Harry Fletcher Scott and Annabel Horn and Latin for Dummies. I already have both of these. I really like Latin Book I and since I'm not interested in my boys talking to long dead Romans, but rather getting a better understanding of English for the sake of their SAT scores; I don't care if they get the pronunciation exactly right.
So that is it. Nothing is ever perfect but I feel pretty good about this, history aside. Actually, I really believe that I'm on the right track with history, I just need to decide on one which book, History Alive or Truthquest. Either that or find them second hand real cheap and take my husbands suggestion.
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
That Time of Year Again
It's that time of year again. The Homeschool Convention is right around the corner and I have started to think about next years school year. It is a little more momentous this time because this will be my third son's first year of High School. I have to come up with a plan not just for next year, but a map for the next for years.
That isn't to say I can't tweak it a little. As with any trip you can take side trips along the way, or decide to go a little more scenic or a little more direct along the way. Still I do need to have a destination in mind or I could end up in San Fransisco when I wanted to be in St Louis.
I think I've done pretty well so far but I am having one problem. HISTORY. I can't make up my mind. I have narrowed it down to two, one, History Alive by Diana Waring and the other, Truthquest. Now I'm stuck. I am in the process of praying about it, but how that goes, "Lord help me make that decision. . . yesterday!" I know He will and that when he does I will sit there having a V-8 moment. Until then though, I want Him to do it yesterday. How childish is that?
I am going through the steps of pretending to be an adult though. I talked with my husband about it and (now I love my husband but...) he was no help at all. He started out saying "I really like this program best, I think you should go with it." Then he looked back at the other program a little more and said "You know I think I like this other program more, I think you should go with it." Finally he said "Why don't you buy them both?" (This is me screaming)
Actually buying both is a good idea, a very good idea, if, that is I happened to have about $150 to flush out my history program with. I have already asked my husband for over $100 to spend on my son's Algebra. I can't justify in my own mind another high priced program. Well, actually two, but together they would make one high priced program.
So I went on to step three while still continuing in step one. I talked to my son about it and said that I wanted him to look at the samples and tell me which he liked best. His first comment was that if he needed to learn history from creation forward, that he could just read the bible until he got to Ancient Egypt. Sensible young man and one point for Truthquest. Then he read the lessons in the two and and said that he liked really liked Diana Warings writing style better. (Two points for History Alive.) I thought he would like it better. She has a student book with her program and conversational style of writing that makes it seem that she is talking to you. Truthquest just has the teachers guide and, while her style is conversational too, she seems to be talking at you.
So the scale is tipped, my son prefers the one program, I ought to be happy right? Wrong. This is what balances out things again. Diana Waring wrote her program to be a unit study. Now don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with unit studies. With younger children they are fantastic. It is my belief though that for a High School student they are rather light weight. Not that I think the history portion is light weight. It can be as heavy or as light as I want it to be. Also some of her writing ideas are rather neat though I think I would add in some strictly research papers as well as the creative writing stuff.
On the other hand, at an age where he needs to be doing biology and chemistry along with their labs, he is rather beyond building a flood in a bottle. She has a week in each of her nine or ten units that is devoted to just those kind of things, because in unit study all subjects, or as many as possible revolve around the unit that you are studying. As a strictly history program it will work quite well for High School. I can choose heavier weight books and writing assignments for him. On the other hand, my personal bias is that High School students are beyond most of the unit study ideas she has. That leaves me with one to two weeks to fill with my own ideas.
I can do that with no trouble. The problem is this, last year about this time when I was planning for this year, My son asked for a more textbook style book. He also asked for more tests. Can you Believe it? I was given textbook that I had him use. I ended up hating it and he got bored so now I am trying to get something a little more in the middle. Something that is more structured but is written in a conversational style. Something that will direct us and give us the ability to do tests but will allow us to pick and choose a little more how we go about it so that we can use things that interest him more. I need a program that will show God's over shadowing hand in all of history. I want him to reach adulthood understanding that God is always in control. That, if He has a plan for the end, and He does, then He must have a plan for how to get there. That nothing ever takes God by surprise, just us. That, as Jeremiah says, He has a plan for us. Plans for good and not evil. The evil we see is ours and Satan's, and even then God has a plan to circumvent it. It doesn't take him by surprise.
That's a lot to ask for in a history program I know. But it is what I am looking for. If I had the money I would take up my husbands idea and buy them both. I know I could make one great program out of them, but I don't so I'm looking for the Lord's leading. He knows what I should do even if I don't. I just need to wait and listen. I wish I were better at both.
That isn't to say I can't tweak it a little. As with any trip you can take side trips along the way, or decide to go a little more scenic or a little more direct along the way. Still I do need to have a destination in mind or I could end up in San Fransisco when I wanted to be in St Louis.
I think I've done pretty well so far but I am having one problem. HISTORY. I can't make up my mind. I have narrowed it down to two, one, History Alive by Diana Waring and the other, Truthquest. Now I'm stuck. I am in the process of praying about it, but how that goes, "Lord help me make that decision. . . yesterday!" I know He will and that when he does I will sit there having a V-8 moment. Until then though, I want Him to do it yesterday. How childish is that?
I am going through the steps of pretending to be an adult though. I talked with my husband about it and (now I love my husband but...) he was no help at all. He started out saying "I really like this program best, I think you should go with it." Then he looked back at the other program a little more and said "You know I think I like this other program more, I think you should go with it." Finally he said "Why don't you buy them both?" (This is me screaming)
Actually buying both is a good idea, a very good idea, if, that is I happened to have about $150 to flush out my history program with. I have already asked my husband for over $100 to spend on my son's Algebra. I can't justify in my own mind another high priced program. Well, actually two, but together they would make one high priced program.
So I went on to step three while still continuing in step one. I talked to my son about it and said that I wanted him to look at the samples and tell me which he liked best. His first comment was that if he needed to learn history from creation forward, that he could just read the bible until he got to Ancient Egypt. Sensible young man and one point for Truthquest. Then he read the lessons in the two and and said that he liked really liked Diana Warings writing style better. (Two points for History Alive.) I thought he would like it better. She has a student book with her program and conversational style of writing that makes it seem that she is talking to you. Truthquest just has the teachers guide and, while her style is conversational too, she seems to be talking at you.
So the scale is tipped, my son prefers the one program, I ought to be happy right? Wrong. This is what balances out things again. Diana Waring wrote her program to be a unit study. Now don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with unit studies. With younger children they are fantastic. It is my belief though that for a High School student they are rather light weight. Not that I think the history portion is light weight. It can be as heavy or as light as I want it to be. Also some of her writing ideas are rather neat though I think I would add in some strictly research papers as well as the creative writing stuff.
On the other hand, at an age where he needs to be doing biology and chemistry along with their labs, he is rather beyond building a flood in a bottle. She has a week in each of her nine or ten units that is devoted to just those kind of things, because in unit study all subjects, or as many as possible revolve around the unit that you are studying. As a strictly history program it will work quite well for High School. I can choose heavier weight books and writing assignments for him. On the other hand, my personal bias is that High School students are beyond most of the unit study ideas she has. That leaves me with one to two weeks to fill with my own ideas.
I can do that with no trouble. The problem is this, last year about this time when I was planning for this year, My son asked for a more textbook style book. He also asked for more tests. Can you Believe it? I was given textbook that I had him use. I ended up hating it and he got bored so now I am trying to get something a little more in the middle. Something that is more structured but is written in a conversational style. Something that will direct us and give us the ability to do tests but will allow us to pick and choose a little more how we go about it so that we can use things that interest him more. I need a program that will show God's over shadowing hand in all of history. I want him to reach adulthood understanding that God is always in control. That, if He has a plan for the end, and He does, then He must have a plan for how to get there. That nothing ever takes God by surprise, just us. That, as Jeremiah says, He has a plan for us. Plans for good and not evil. The evil we see is ours and Satan's, and even then God has a plan to circumvent it. It doesn't take him by surprise.
That's a lot to ask for in a history program I know. But it is what I am looking for. If I had the money I would take up my husbands idea and buy them both. I know I could make one great program out of them, but I don't so I'm looking for the Lord's leading. He knows what I should do even if I don't. I just need to wait and listen. I wish I were better at both.
Thursday, March 8, 2007
Things The Lord Taught Me Through My Son’s Death
Fifteen years ago next month our son, Joshua, died. It was a very difficult period for our whole family. As my father told one of the Doctors when he became angry with him, “This isn’t a slab of meat we’re talking about here Doc. It’s a little boy that quite a lot of people happen to care quite a lot about.” We all blamed ourselves to one extent or another for his death. To this day my mother still blames herself. The Lord has brought my husband and me peace though. He’s good that way.
Does this mean that I don’t miss our son or have sorrow over his absence? Absolutely not. Whenever I see my boys standing all together or when I look at a family picture, my first thought is that he is missing. Every April grief becomes my companion. As Memorial Day creeps up and the stores all start putting out flowers it’s especially hard because they never make flower arrangements for children. My husband watches me week after week as I search in vain for something appropriate. Finally I give up and push past those isles purposely looking the other way. If I look toward my husband during those times I find him watching me, always with sorrow for me in his eyes. In December I mark his birthday with thoughts of “this year he would have started school,” or “gone to camp,” or “started to drive,” or whatever else is appropriate. In my hear I have never stopped being the mother of five sons.
This year we would have been getting him ready for college. Next year would have marked the start of his adult life. So many years for a mother to have missed out on. So what is left? What do I have to rejoice in? Well this is some of what the Lord has taught me so far.
1. Life, our own and those whom we love, are gifts and privileges to be cherished not rights of time that we can waist. We need to do the good we can while we can because there may not be a later. And we need to let those we love know how important they are to us so that later we don’t have to wonder if they understood just how important they where.
2. Small amounts of time can have profound affects on our lives. Our son was with us two and a half years and yet he changed us and our family in many ways. The good things and people we fill our lives with change our lives in good ways and, conversely the evil that we do and the bad influences that we abide change us in bad way even. If they are only there for a short while those changes have life long consequences.
3. Children are indeed a blessing from the Lord. I know it’s hard to believe when they young and are keeping you up all night with sickness or worry. When the day comes though that you are looking at their not being there any more you finally see how much of a blessing they are. The Lord has used them to grow you up, to draw you into being less self centered, and to give you a deep and rich knowledge of Himself and His love for you.
"Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!” Matthew 7:9-11
4. The Lord never lets us go, no matter what. I can remember days when I was so hurt and angry that I thought I wanted him to. I can remember crying out “why wont you let me go, why won’t you just let me go?” I came to realize that He could no more let a child of his in trouble go than I could one of my own. He could never stop loving me and calling me back to Himself.
John 10:28-29 says “I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one can snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me is greater than all; no one can snatch them out of my Father’s hand.” He is ever waiting, watching and calling to us, just as a mother calls to a lost child.
5. The next thing I learned is one of the most profound and yet hardest to put into words, so you will have to be patient with me. What I want to try and put into words is how privileged I feel. I haven’t always felt that way. For a long time I whined over having our son taken so soon. Then one day I realized what a privilege it was to have a child who had so few years. Think about it. Joshua only had 2 ½ short years to learn all he needed to prepare him to meet with our Heavenly Father. Just two and a half years and the Lord trusted those years with us. I wouldn’t have. If I were God I can think of a lot of people whom I would be more willing to trust those years with than us. But He didn’t. Out of all the people in the world He trusted those few short years with us.
I used to look at those few years and ask why in a hurt, self centered sort of way. Now I still ask why but in an awed, humble way. I feel like David when he cried out to God “What is man that you are so mindful of him?” I find myself thinking, “Who am I Lord that you would trust me with the life of this child? I’m nobody special.” But trust me He did. I hope I made Him proud.
6. Next there is life after the death of a child. There was a time when I’m not sure you could have convinced me of that though, being a “Super Christian” I would never have admitted it out loud. Still it is true. Not only is there live after the death of a child but, with the Lords help, there is rich abundant life. Not just a busy life, but a full, happy life. Do I still wish at time that I had all five of my boys together? Yes, but the truth is that my other children bring me great joy. So do my husband, my friends, my church, my other family members, and most importantly my God. Without Him teaching, patiently teaching me this I would probably still be wallowing in my grief. He taught me that Joshua wasn’t my only reason for existing and he had a lot more planned for my life.
7. Lastly life on this earth is not all there is. 1 Thes. 4:13-18 says "Brother, we do not want you to be ignorant about those who fall asleep, or to grieve like the rest of men, who have no hope. We believe that Jesus died and rose again and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him. According to the Lord's own word, we tell you that we who are still alive, who are left till the coming of the Lord, will certainly not precede those who have fallen asleep. For the Lord himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever. Therefore encourage each other with these words."
We used this passage for our son's funeral. We did it as much for ourselves as for the others at the service. We all know it or at least it's sentiments but while we say we believe it, I think that often, when we are struck with grief, we forget that this life isn't all there is. It was important to my husband and I, in the midst of all that sorrow, to remind ourselves that our children are not our god and that if we lost any or all of them it wouldn't be the end of our relationship. The Lord has planned for better than that. How gracious and kind of Him! What a balm to a grieving mothers heart!
It doesn't make that time of grief and sorrow easy, but it is easier knowing that the Lord is there walking with us, and when we need it, carrying us through it all; that it wasn't a surprise for Him. He planned for it and how to get through it before the beginning of time. Not only did he plan a way to get through the sorrow, but he planned for the reunion on that great day when we all meet again. Oh what a banquet that will be! Oh what rejoicing when we meet Christ and our loved ones, when we are no longer strangers but are finally home.
Last night after I had almost finished this, our pastor, Bro. John, said in passing "I thank God for the struggles and hard times. They bring us depth. I've known Christian who haven't had any trials and they are shallow. Their faith is only an inch deep." I guess that pretty much sums up what I'm trying to say. Hard times are just that, hard, but they bring a depth of faith and maturity that I rejoice in. This time we spend here seems long and the road we walk is rocky and hard. We grow weak and tired, especially when we try to make it under our own power. But in truth it is only the blink of an eye when weighed against eternity.
One day, when we are finally at home with our Father, as we tell each other our stories, we will be like soldiers, laughing at the things we went through and how we thought we might not make it through that one. As for me, I will also crawl into my Fathers arms and the two of us will weep out our heart over the deaths of our sons and rejoice in our respective reunion stories. It couldn't have been easy for Him to watch His son die. Yet for my sake and your's He allowed it. He loved us enough to allow it. I'm not sure I could.
Does this mean that I don’t miss our son or have sorrow over his absence? Absolutely not. Whenever I see my boys standing all together or when I look at a family picture, my first thought is that he is missing. Every April grief becomes my companion. As Memorial Day creeps up and the stores all start putting out flowers it’s especially hard because they never make flower arrangements for children. My husband watches me week after week as I search in vain for something appropriate. Finally I give up and push past those isles purposely looking the other way. If I look toward my husband during those times I find him watching me, always with sorrow for me in his eyes. In December I mark his birthday with thoughts of “this year he would have started school,” or “gone to camp,” or “started to drive,” or whatever else is appropriate. In my hear I have never stopped being the mother of five sons.
This year we would have been getting him ready for college. Next year would have marked the start of his adult life. So many years for a mother to have missed out on. So what is left? What do I have to rejoice in? Well this is some of what the Lord has taught me so far.
1. Life, our own and those whom we love, are gifts and privileges to be cherished not rights of time that we can waist. We need to do the good we can while we can because there may not be a later. And we need to let those we love know how important they are to us so that later we don’t have to wonder if they understood just how important they where.
2. Small amounts of time can have profound affects on our lives. Our son was with us two and a half years and yet he changed us and our family in many ways. The good things and people we fill our lives with change our lives in good ways and, conversely the evil that we do and the bad influences that we abide change us in bad way even. If they are only there for a short while those changes have life long consequences.
3. Children are indeed a blessing from the Lord. I know it’s hard to believe when they young and are keeping you up all night with sickness or worry. When the day comes though that you are looking at their not being there any more you finally see how much of a blessing they are. The Lord has used them to grow you up, to draw you into being less self centered, and to give you a deep and rich knowledge of Himself and His love for you.
"Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!” Matthew 7:9-11
4. The Lord never lets us go, no matter what. I can remember days when I was so hurt and angry that I thought I wanted him to. I can remember crying out “why wont you let me go, why won’t you just let me go?” I came to realize that He could no more let a child of his in trouble go than I could one of my own. He could never stop loving me and calling me back to Himself.
John 10:28-29 says “I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one can snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me is greater than all; no one can snatch them out of my Father’s hand.” He is ever waiting, watching and calling to us, just as a mother calls to a lost child.
5. The next thing I learned is one of the most profound and yet hardest to put into words, so you will have to be patient with me. What I want to try and put into words is how privileged I feel. I haven’t always felt that way. For a long time I whined over having our son taken so soon. Then one day I realized what a privilege it was to have a child who had so few years. Think about it. Joshua only had 2 ½ short years to learn all he needed to prepare him to meet with our Heavenly Father. Just two and a half years and the Lord trusted those years with us. I wouldn’t have. If I were God I can think of a lot of people whom I would be more willing to trust those years with than us. But He didn’t. Out of all the people in the world He trusted those few short years with us.
I used to look at those few years and ask why in a hurt, self centered sort of way. Now I still ask why but in an awed, humble way. I feel like David when he cried out to God “What is man that you are so mindful of him?” I find myself thinking, “Who am I Lord that you would trust me with the life of this child? I’m nobody special.” But trust me He did. I hope I made Him proud.
6. Next there is life after the death of a child. There was a time when I’m not sure you could have convinced me of that though, being a “Super Christian” I would never have admitted it out loud. Still it is true. Not only is there live after the death of a child but, with the Lords help, there is rich abundant life. Not just a busy life, but a full, happy life. Do I still wish at time that I had all five of my boys together? Yes, but the truth is that my other children bring me great joy. So do my husband, my friends, my church, my other family members, and most importantly my God. Without Him teaching, patiently teaching me this I would probably still be wallowing in my grief. He taught me that Joshua wasn’t my only reason for existing and he had a lot more planned for my life.
7. Lastly life on this earth is not all there is. 1 Thes. 4:13-18 says "Brother, we do not want you to be ignorant about those who fall asleep, or to grieve like the rest of men, who have no hope. We believe that Jesus died and rose again and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him. According to the Lord's own word, we tell you that we who are still alive, who are left till the coming of the Lord, will certainly not precede those who have fallen asleep. For the Lord himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever. Therefore encourage each other with these words."
We used this passage for our son's funeral. We did it as much for ourselves as for the others at the service. We all know it or at least it's sentiments but while we say we believe it, I think that often, when we are struck with grief, we forget that this life isn't all there is. It was important to my husband and I, in the midst of all that sorrow, to remind ourselves that our children are not our god and that if we lost any or all of them it wouldn't be the end of our relationship. The Lord has planned for better than that. How gracious and kind of Him! What a balm to a grieving mothers heart!
It doesn't make that time of grief and sorrow easy, but it is easier knowing that the Lord is there walking with us, and when we need it, carrying us through it all; that it wasn't a surprise for Him. He planned for it and how to get through it before the beginning of time. Not only did he plan a way to get through the sorrow, but he planned for the reunion on that great day when we all meet again. Oh what a banquet that will be! Oh what rejoicing when we meet Christ and our loved ones, when we are no longer strangers but are finally home.
Last night after I had almost finished this, our pastor, Bro. John, said in passing "I thank God for the struggles and hard times. They bring us depth. I've known Christian who haven't had any trials and they are shallow. Their faith is only an inch deep." I guess that pretty much sums up what I'm trying to say. Hard times are just that, hard, but they bring a depth of faith and maturity that I rejoice in. This time we spend here seems long and the road we walk is rocky and hard. We grow weak and tired, especially when we try to make it under our own power. But in truth it is only the blink of an eye when weighed against eternity.
One day, when we are finally at home with our Father, as we tell each other our stories, we will be like soldiers, laughing at the things we went through and how we thought we might not make it through that one. As for me, I will also crawl into my Fathers arms and the two of us will weep out our heart over the deaths of our sons and rejoice in our respective reunion stories. It couldn't have been easy for Him to watch His son die. Yet for my sake and your's He allowed it. He loved us enough to allow it. I'm not sure I could.
Tuesday, March 6, 2007
Exercise OR How to Kill Oneself Very Painfully
I am nothing if not stubborn. Now don't tell my family that I admitted that. They have been trying to convince me that I am for years and I have been trying to convince them that I am the most flexible, reasonable member of this house full of Hard Headed Hassetts. They laugh as I explain this to them; still I will never admit to having gained a stubborn streak after living with this family for over 20 years.
How does any of this relate to exercise? Well, I have decided that to continue to loose weight I am actually going to have to get up off the couch and use my muscles a little. I had been doing push ups, set ups, an all the other exercises the Army had taught me. It was working pretty well too until the day I pushed to hard and hurt my back. I decided that it was a bad idea to stop exercising or I would quit all together. After all it does take 30 days to build a habit, right. Bad idea. It was two weeks before the pain in my back quit. By then I caught the flue, then my husband caught the flue, then he ended up in ICU. So it was a month before I started exercising again.
When my husband came home he bought me something called a gazelle to exercise with. Now after my last bought you would think I would learn my lesson, right? Wrong! I got on there and tried to get back all the muscles I had lost over the last 22 years in a week. Actually I started out OK. But I added time too fast and by the fourth day I decided that it might be a good idea to cut my time in half. By the fifth day when I tried to get out of bed in the morning, I hurt so bad that I had a hard time taking those first three steps. I decided I had better exercise a little or I would get stiff and unable to do anything.
By the sixth day I was hurting so bad that I had to hold on to things in the morning to work my way to the bathroom. I decided that I had better do some stretching to limber myself up a little. That literally brought tears to my eyes. At that point my husband stepped in and told me to let it go for the day. The next day I helped my husband cut and move the branches that we lost during the ice storm. When we finished I decided that was probably enough exercise for the day.
That was yesterday. Today I'm feeling pretty good and am ready to start again. My husband has laid down the law though. He told me that I am only to exercise for four minute for the first three day. I can then add one or two minutes but I am not to raise my time for another three day. I am to continue on that path until I work my way up to the amount time I want to do, (30 minutes.) He rarely ever stops me, but when he puts his foot down I know that it is for my own good. What I did to deserve such a guy I don't know, but I definatly got the better end of the deal. He laughs and says I make life interesting. I think complicated might be a more accurate term.
How does any of this relate to exercise? Well, I have decided that to continue to loose weight I am actually going to have to get up off the couch and use my muscles a little. I had been doing push ups, set ups, an all the other exercises the Army had taught me. It was working pretty well too until the day I pushed to hard and hurt my back. I decided that it was a bad idea to stop exercising or I would quit all together. After all it does take 30 days to build a habit, right. Bad idea. It was two weeks before the pain in my back quit. By then I caught the flue, then my husband caught the flue, then he ended up in ICU. So it was a month before I started exercising again.
When my husband came home he bought me something called a gazelle to exercise with. Now after my last bought you would think I would learn my lesson, right? Wrong! I got on there and tried to get back all the muscles I had lost over the last 22 years in a week. Actually I started out OK. But I added time too fast and by the fourth day I decided that it might be a good idea to cut my time in half. By the fifth day when I tried to get out of bed in the morning, I hurt so bad that I had a hard time taking those first three steps. I decided I had better exercise a little or I would get stiff and unable to do anything.
By the sixth day I was hurting so bad that I had to hold on to things in the morning to work my way to the bathroom. I decided that I had better do some stretching to limber myself up a little. That literally brought tears to my eyes. At that point my husband stepped in and told me to let it go for the day. The next day I helped my husband cut and move the branches that we lost during the ice storm. When we finished I decided that was probably enough exercise for the day.
That was yesterday. Today I'm feeling pretty good and am ready to start again. My husband has laid down the law though. He told me that I am only to exercise for four minute for the first three day. I can then add one or two minutes but I am not to raise my time for another three day. I am to continue on that path until I work my way up to the amount time I want to do, (30 minutes.) He rarely ever stops me, but when he puts his foot down I know that it is for my own good. What I did to deserve such a guy I don't know, but I definatly got the better end of the deal. He laughs and says I make life interesting. I think complicated might be a more accurate term.
Friday, March 2, 2007
Left Overs
I read an article on Tammy's Recipes about how she had used some left over chicken and potato to help her make a quick, easy meal for company the next day. Now don't get me wrong, I love her site; it's been a real help to me. She does a wonderful job in everything from teaching frugality to pulling recipes together on the fly.
I also understand that her family and mine are rather different in their dynamics. She has two young children and a husband to feed. I have three young men, a husband and a six year old to feed, all good eaters. And there in lies my dilemma. Granted, my husband and I have some excess weight, (alright more than our fair share of excess weight, but we are working on it.) But the boys and all well within a healthy weight range; as a matter of fact three are down right skinny. They are young and active though so they use all the calories they eat.
For this reason I never, well hardly ever have left overs. If I so end up with left overs they are gone before bed time. And don't tell me to double up because if I make twice as much, they eat twice as much. I don't know where the food goes, but it doesn't hang around on their body. They just burn it up. My refrigerator is open more than it is closed. Every meal for me is a start over. I could never cook a chicken and have it be enough. I need at least two. We can go through 10 pounds of leg quarters in a meal and when they are gone you can still hear the guys in the kitchen looking for more.
I rejoice that Tammy can make that system work. I wish sometimes that I could. On the other hand for that to work for me would mean that I would have to loose two to three kids. That day is fast approaching as the oldest grow up and move out. Come the fall semester I will loose my oldest to OSU. My other son has decided to go to the U of A after he finishes at the community college, so he will be around for another four years. Still four years is but a blink of the eye. My next son has plans to do two years at NWACC and then join the Marines. Soon I will be left with only my youngest.
In a way I don't look forward to those days. I know it is what I planned and worked for, but when my children are gone they will be gone. The three oldest have told me that there is nothing here for them, and given their chosen occupations, they are probably right. Then will come the quiet time. Things around here have been so loud and so active for so long I have no idea any more how to live that way. I have spent a lot of years feeling like a movie star with my own little entourage following me where ever I go. I don't look forward to when they are gone.
I know it is a different stage of my life. A time when my husband can spend time just with each other again. We had such a short period of that, just a year. I do love the rare moments when it is just the two of us. He wants to travel. I would like to do that. I hope that the Lord alows us those years. Still I will miss my children. And I'm not sure I can ever learn to cook for just two or three.
I know "a double minded man is unstable in all his ways." The Lord and I need to work on this one.
I also understand that her family and mine are rather different in their dynamics. She has two young children and a husband to feed. I have three young men, a husband and a six year old to feed, all good eaters. And there in lies my dilemma. Granted, my husband and I have some excess weight, (alright more than our fair share of excess weight, but we are working on it.) But the boys and all well within a healthy weight range; as a matter of fact three are down right skinny. They are young and active though so they use all the calories they eat.
For this reason I never, well hardly ever have left overs. If I so end up with left overs they are gone before bed time. And don't tell me to double up because if I make twice as much, they eat twice as much. I don't know where the food goes, but it doesn't hang around on their body. They just burn it up. My refrigerator is open more than it is closed. Every meal for me is a start over. I could never cook a chicken and have it be enough. I need at least two. We can go through 10 pounds of leg quarters in a meal and when they are gone you can still hear the guys in the kitchen looking for more.
I rejoice that Tammy can make that system work. I wish sometimes that I could. On the other hand for that to work for me would mean that I would have to loose two to three kids. That day is fast approaching as the oldest grow up and move out. Come the fall semester I will loose my oldest to OSU. My other son has decided to go to the U of A after he finishes at the community college, so he will be around for another four years. Still four years is but a blink of the eye. My next son has plans to do two years at NWACC and then join the Marines. Soon I will be left with only my youngest.
In a way I don't look forward to those days. I know it is what I planned and worked for, but when my children are gone they will be gone. The three oldest have told me that there is nothing here for them, and given their chosen occupations, they are probably right. Then will come the quiet time. Things around here have been so loud and so active for so long I have no idea any more how to live that way. I have spent a lot of years feeling like a movie star with my own little entourage following me where ever I go. I don't look forward to when they are gone.
I know it is a different stage of my life. A time when my husband can spend time just with each other again. We had such a short period of that, just a year. I do love the rare moments when it is just the two of us. He wants to travel. I would like to do that. I hope that the Lord alows us those years. Still I will miss my children. And I'm not sure I can ever learn to cook for just two or three.
I know "a double minded man is unstable in all his ways." The Lord and I need to work on this one.
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